It's official - I accepted a new full-time job, and I will be taking over the role of primary wage earner in our family. This is something I've been considering for a while now, but I've been rather torn about the idea. Women today have so many choices about what they do for a living. At times those choices seem stressful and guilt inducing, rather than liberating. That's certainly been the case for me.

In our household, I hold the college degree. This is something I'm proud of. It's also something that's contributed a great deal to my sense of guilt over the years. As the degree holder, there is a wider availability of jobs out there for me. Jobs with potentially higher pay and better benefits. But as a woman and a mom, my heart has told me my place has been at home with my babies. So that's where I decided to place myself when I became pregnant with Brady. I was fortunate enough to be with my older two their first three years of life, and that's truly where I wanted to be with Brady. I was willing to make sacrifices to do that.

However, now the time has come that I am ready to get back to the workforce. To put my degrees to use and to stop feeling like a burden to my husband. In case you don't know, Bill is twenty years my senior. He's had more than his fair share of work over his lifetime. It's time for me to contribute financially to our family in a more significant way. Truthfully, though, I'm not sure that four years ago would have been the time for Bill to take on the role of stay at home daddy. Now that Brady's nearly four, he and his daddy are able to spend more fun times together, telling stories "out of their heads" or playing games, and the big kids are more independent as well. Now seems like a good time for us to switch roles. I'm ready to give up the chauffering and cleaning up the potty training accidents, and he's ready to give up some of the pressure associated with being the breadwinner. It's all good.

But I haven't even told you about my job yet! I have two pretty spiffy titles - Behavior Specialist Consultant and Mobile Therapist. Basically, what I'll be doing is helping families to learn more productive behavioral techniques in dealing with the day to day things life throws our way. It's a challenging job, but I know that it will be rewarding as well. I've done this kind of a position in the past, and there's lots of flexibility and creativity involved in the position. I love that. Did I mention the benefits are amazing AND affordable? I couldn't pass any of this up.

Am I nervous though? Oh, hell yeah! Now it's my turn to take on that pressure of bringing in the income. It's been a while since I was in that position. Truthfully, though, I miss the sense of autonomy that comes with earning a full time income. It will also be nice to derive the sense of identity that comes with working a full time job.

I'm not giving up my blogger identity, though. I love it too much. Being a blogger also allows me creativity and lets me connect with like-minded people in a way I never have. It's fun and exciting, and I'm simply too damn addicted to the lifestyle and the community to ever give it up. I'm kind of selfish. I want it all. I want my fun side gig AND the responsible day job. I know so many people who are working their asses off to make blogging that full-time gig, but for me, I really struggled with that. I think I finally realized the reason. Like the person who loves to cook, but doesn't want to be a professional chef for fear of no longer loving it, I do think that blogging was a bit like that for me. The pressure of making it my full time gig and HAVING to earn a living from my writing was too much pressure. I found it hard to love the writing process. I truly think I've made the decision that will work best for me and for my family. I sure hope I have.

On a side note, this whole post reminds me of the book Good Enough is the New Perfect by my friends Becky and Hollee. Check out this guest post they wrote for me on reinventing your career. I guess that's really what I'm doing now.

I love my freelance writing career, I truly do. Since beginning my blog three years ago, I've enjoyed learning about the writing process and networking with some amazing and brilliant people all around the world. But I'm a creature of habit, who thrives on routine. In Meyers-Brigg Type Inventory speak, I'm an ENFJ - Extrovert Intuitive Feeling Judging. Basically, the big takeaway here is that I'm a people person who goes with her instinct and her heart, and enjoys structure. When it comes to freelance writing, things are often solitary and up in the air.

So I've begun pursuing some job options outside the home. I love writing my college blogs, but I miss the actual daily interaction with students I enjoyed when I was a community college adviser. I've applied for a couple of full-time college student affairs positions, and I've actually had a phone interview, with an in-person interview coming up this week. I've also applied for a couple of part-time jobs that have nothing to do with academia. Jobs at the local mall down the street and nearby outlet mall.

Another prominent aspect of my personality is my indecisiveness. I'm constantly considering the pros and cons of everything, including what to order for lunch. I mean, honestly, I don't get out much. When I get the chance to go out for lunch with a friend, I want to be sure I order something good! You can only imagine the angst I'm causing myself as I consider my career options. But just look at the support I have. How fortunate I am to have options!

Going back to work full time as an enrollment adviser would be great in many ways. Having a steady income and daily interaction with students is exactly what I've been looking for, but the commute would be long - an hour each way. One of the reasons I left my previous college position was to spend more time with my kids. Brady's three and a half now, and he goes to daycare part time. I feel like now would be a good time to give working full time a try. And the health and educational benefits offered with this position can't be beat. It would be nice not to worry about medical issues for the family.

On the other hand, I've become used to the flexibility of working at home. I'm able to attend school events, go to appointments and work a schedule that fits around my family. In addition, I'm able to pursue so many different opportunities the online space has to offer. Blogging has brought me an amazing number of opportunities thus far, and I know that if I work hard, I can make so many more for myself.

For now, I've decided to just take things as they come. I'll go to the interview on Thursday and learn about the adviser position. There's really no need to stress. If I'm offered the job, I can start to stress! No, truthfully, I'm not worried. What's meant to be will be. I don't have to quit blogging and writing if I get a full-time gig. In fact, I have no intention of doing so. I truly believe that things happen for a reason. If I decided to go back to work full time, I know it will be for the betterment of myself and my family. I can see myself growing in a position such as this. It would be just another phase in my journey of "Everyday Baby Steps" that make me the person I'm meant to be.

I began working toward becoming a freelance writer nearly three years ago. When I started my journey, I had no idea the potential the internet would offer. In fact, I had intended to pursue writing for print media such as magazines, journals and trade publications. I'm happy to say that today I'm earning money as a writer. However, I've never written anything for print. Everything I've been paid to write has been online, and my writing career truly started with blogging.

I began this blog shortly after the birth of my third child, and the loss of my steady job, as a way of simply practicing my writing and creating a platform with which to show editors my abilities. I had no idea the path blogging as a profession and movement would take, nor did I ever imagine the opportunities it would provide. Blogging has given me:

• Practice to hone my writing skills
• The opportunity to network with potential employers and friends
• Knowledge and proficiency in using social media
• Business sense and excitement about entrepreneurship
• Confidence in my abilities and worth as a writer and a marketer.

I've spoken and written countless times about putting yourself out there and knowing your worth. But then I seemed to forget my own advice, and I got lost for awhile. Lost in the day to day of just getting by, rather than making a plan and setting goals. Somehow, recently, I've managed to snap out of it. I've been more assertive about making my own opportunities and reaching out for the kinds of writing I want to do. And it seems to be working!

At the beginning of the year, I reached out through a letter of introduction to the owner of a website I was interested in writing for, and that bold move paid off. I now have a regular gig writing on topics related to education and career. The icing on the cake is that the job pays pretty darn well! I've also started to be more assertive about getting involved in affiliate marketing and in selling advertising on my blogs. In fact, I recently pitched my ad services on GigCoin as a means of promoting what I have to offer. I'm tired of sitting around waiting for good things to happen for me!

It takes a lot of work and a lot of courage to put yourself out there and step out of your comfort zone. I can see already that it's worth the effort. I'm even getting excited about building up some of my other long set aside projects and hope to give you an update on them soon. It all really comes down to confidence. For me, getting past the fear and moving forward has led to small successes. These small accomplishments have increased my confidence and will likely lead to even greater successes. The year's off to a really good start.

What about you? What kind of changes are you making to take steps toward achieving your goals? I really want to hear about them. Let's encourage each other!

* Sponsored post, but every word is true.

I've seen so many yearly review posts on blogs in the last day or so. It's really gotten me to thinking about the past year as far as blogging goes. Because I've been feeling kind of down lately and like I haven't accomplished the kinds of goals I had hoped to, I've decided that it's probably a good idea to take a look at the past year objectively to get a fresh perspective on what I've actually done. Here goes.

Going Places

I was lucky enough to start off the year by heading off to Nashville for Blissdom in February. I got to meet and travel with one of my favorite online friends, Angela Moore, as well as hang out with some fabulous bloggers. I also got to see Harry Connick Jr. perform. Swoon!

In May, I was fortunate enough to be asked to spend the day getting to know Chevrolet. It was an amazing day because I got the chance to learn about the new cars from Chevy and experience them up close. I also met a great group of bloggers from Pittburgh and the surrounding area and established some really wonderful relationships. And we were able to visit some local sites like Frank Lloyd Wright's Fallingwater and Seven Springs. It was so nice.

That day with Chevrolet carried on to a future relationship when Chevy so generously donated a 2011 Traverse for me and three fellow mom bloggers to drive to the Type-A Mom conference in Asheville, NC. We had such a great time. I really bonded with my fellow Pittsburgh area mom bloggers and learned so much at the conference, connecting with tons of fabulous women and enjoying Asheville food and culture.

Brushes With Celebrity

2010 really was the year of celebrity encounters for me. I had the opportunity to meet or talk to a lot of very cool, well-known people. First, I'll mention that I had the chance to talk to Dr. Oz - twice. I was able to listen in on two teleconferences and ask one question of him each time. The first time was in June. Sadly, I was so busy with summertime activities and the kids being home, that I didn't take the time to write anything up. I won't make that mistake this time. I just talked to him last week about his weight loss program for the new year. Stay tuned for info on Dr. Oz's new weight loss program and some insight on his own food weaknesses very soon!

I had some fun encounters with a couple of my kids' favorite Nickelodean and Disney stars. We were able to attend a Pittsburgh grocery event and meet Reed Alexander, who plays Neville on iCarly. He was promoting his new cookbook, and he was absolutely adorable and sweet. The kids loved him, too!

The kids and I also ran into Rachael Bell, who plays Addison on Disney's Suite Life on Deck at our local grocery store. Seriously, we did. She happens to live in our town and goes to the local high school She was such a sweet girl. The kids were shy about meeting her, but she was so gracious and friendly.

Speaking of child stars. It was very cool to be able to interview Candace Cameron Bure, of Full House fame. I was inspired by her drive to be a healthy mom to her kids and her commitment to her faith. It was very nice to talk to her. In fact, she has a book coming out, and I believe I'll be interviewing her again by email very soon. Keep an eye out for that!

One of the greatest thrills I had this past year was when I talked to Carol Evans, the President of Working Mother Media. What an inspiring woman. She started out selling advertising when Working Mother magazine first launched in the '70's. She's worked her way up, all the while raising her own children. Carol had lots of advice for women in the workforce as well as moms who stay at home.

Professional Achievements

Whew! This post is getting very long, so I'll try to wrap things up quickly. While I haven't had the kinds of professional writing achievements I had hoped to reach this year, I have made some fabulous partnerships and earned a bit from my own blogs. This has inspired me to consider branching out and growing my own online projects. I think this is truly where my passion lies and that I've been avoiding pursuing my own projects out of fear, all the while searching for something more secure. Success is worth the risk. I plan to keep this in mind as I move forward into 2011.

So I guess I didn't have such a bad year, after all. I totally recommend taking some time to analyze your own year in review. You may be surprised at how far you've come. Tell me, what was your greatest achievement of 2010? What are you most proud of?

Beautiful Photo by It's Life

Yes, I said bitch. Not something you see a lot here at Everyday Baby Steps. I do swear in real life. Not like a sailor or anything, but I do. I don't swear (until now) on my blog. Wanna know why? Because I was afraid to offend any potential readers. Truly, I was. I rationalized it by saying that it doesn't make sense to drive people away who may be offended by swear words and that there really isn't any need to use them. But the truth? I was scared to lose possible readers or to offend anyone.

Fear Has Held Me Back In So Many Ways

I do try to be myself on this blog. I hope that I show my compassion, my genuine interest in supporting and encouraging other moms, and my love of all things cosmetics. But I haven't really talked much about my faults, my quirks, or my fears here. I just noticed that the times I did share more of myself are the times I received the most comments. Interesting.

My whole life, I've allowed fear to hold me back . I can remember, as a little girl, wanting to try new things but holding back because I was afraid. In fact, I see that in my own daughter, and it breaks my heart. I try so hard to encourage her and to show her it's okay to try new things. So why can't go beyond the fear and try myself? Why can't I take my own advice?

Fear and My Career

One of the most frustrating things about letting fear rule my life is the impact its had on my career. I've had some wonderful opportunities over the last couple of years since deciding to pursue freelance writing. I've taken advantage of many of them, but I've let many others just slip away. I've used excuses like being too busy, leading such a hectic lifestyle with three kids, not having the money... Truth is, I was afraid. Afraid to pursue more, to go after better, to look for the opportunities that excite me.

Instead, I've stuck with the safe and easy writing opportunities. While I've taken steps to move ahead to better paying jobs, for the most part, I'm still not where I'd like to be. This realization really hit home for me last week when I lost a pretty decent writing job. I was bummed, and I was scared. But I was kind of relieved. The material was boring and not very fulfilling, beyond the paycheck. And that check? Not bad compared to many jobs, but this was a rather large company, and it's likely they could've paid more.

Moving Beyond the Fear

So now what do I do? I'm not exactly sure, but I have some pretty good ideas. For starters, I plan to be more real here on my own blog, my personal outlet. Also, I'm feeling very energized about the ideas I have for pitching to national publications. While I'm realistic about the number of writers whose queries are accepted to the big magazines, I also know that I can no longer let fear stop me from trying. I convinced myself in the past that I didn't have time to query, wait for a response, do a ton of research, and wait even longer for  a paycheck. I know now that self-fulfillment in what I write and what I'm worth as a writer is worth the wait and the work. It's certainly worth dealing with the fear. Damn it.